Examples of IELTS Writing Task 1 Essays: More than 6 Bands

From Band 6 to Band 8

A Comparative Analysis of Writing Task 1

The Prompt

The chart below shows the main reasons why people in the UK ride bicycles to work (survey results).

(Data Points: Health: 50% Women/50% Men | Pollution: 30% Women/15% Men | Parking: 10% Women/40% Men)

The Band 6 Response

Competent but Limited

The bar chart illustrates the reasons why people cycle to work in the UK by gender. Overall, health is the most popular reason for both, but parking is important for men.

First, 50% of women said they cycle for health. This is the same for men, which is also 50%. However, fewer women cycle because of parking problems. Only 10% of women chose this. On the other hand, 40% of men cycle because of parking.

Also, pollution is another reason. 30% of women cycle for this reason, which is higher than men (15%). In conclusion, men and women have different reasons.

Why is this Band 6?

Task Achievement: Basic overview. Simply lists data ("50% said this, 40% said that"). No real comparison.
Coherence: Mechanical linkers (However, On the other hand, Also). Feels "choppy."
Lexical Resource: Repetitive vocabulary ("reason," "cycle," "said").
Grammar: Simple sentences. Accurate, but basic.

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✨ The Band 8 Upgrade (Click to Close) High Level

The chart compares the primary motivations for cycling to work among British men and women. Overall, while health is the dominant factor for both genders, men are significantly more motivated by parking concerns, whereas women are more driven by environmental issues.

In terms of physical well-being, the figures are identical, with exactly half of both groups citing this as their main incentive. By contrast, the data regarding parking reveals a striking discrepancy. While 40% of men cycle to avoid parking difficulties, this is a concern for only a minority of women (10%).

Finally, environmental factors show the opposite trend. The proportion of women concerned with pollution (30%) is double that of their male counterparts (15%).

Why is this Band 8?

Task Achievement	Overview interprets the data ("dominant factor," "driven by"). Highlights differences ("double that of").
Coherence	Links ideas, not just sentences ("In terms of," "By contrast"). No "mechanical" transition words.
Lexical Resource	Precise vocabulary: motivations, incentive, discrepancy, counterparts, minority.
Grammar	Complex comparison structures ("The proportion of... is double that of...").

💡 Key Takeaway: The Band 6 writer describes the numbers one by one. The Band 8 writer describes the relationship between the numbers.